Something I came across.

Finis vitae sed non amoris

- the end of life, but not of love

The Last Day

It was the last day I get to see you. I died a little inside knowing I would not melt by your beauty everyday from now on. I miss your calm walk on the stairs already, and I miss your sweet perfume more than ever. A little blue feeling passed by, I walked you to the car. Well, it was a privilege because I was the one who took you home for your last day. I hugged you and told you that I wanted to be like this forever. You laughed and said that I should calm down because it was not like we will not ever meet again. That made me smile. You promised, right? I wanted that car trip to last a little longer. I could not help but stared at you sometimes. I will miss your skinny pale hands, your long curled up eyelashes, your attractive lips, and your sharp look a lot. And the way you listen to music so loud that I could hear every single word and you would turn to me to ask if it is too much with a blushed smile. I will definitely miss your everything. Simply because you are my everything. Clandestinely, I took your phone and wrote a brief note saying I love you. So that I know I will stay in your heart and that you will smile when you see this note once in a while. I was dying inside. I was. When you arrived, I gave you one last hug. I held on to it and embraced it like nothing else mattered. Yet, it was time to let you go.

I let you go but in my heart, you forever stay. I will learn to take care of myself just like you said. I will learn to mature up and be a classy one just like you. Goodbye is too much, so see you again, my infinity.

Then what?

If someone knows well about your past but still love you anyway despite any flaws, then you better hold on to that person.

However, if it is the other way around, meaning the person knows how much you have done for him/her but still chooses to walk way.
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Then what?

Brief note.

Love is patient, love is kind C:

I appreciate having you in my life. I really do. Only you can bring me out of darkness. And thanks for actually held me through that time.

Irrelevant feelings.

Well, since I have made it clear that this is irrelevant to me myself, I feel like I am speaking out my heart to someone who deserves to hear.

If you have to choose between being loved and being respected, always choose being respected. In love, there is no right or wrong, only should or shouldn't. That is why you should take your dignity with you instead of being crashed down by the desire of love. If you believe you have given enough, that you have fought so hard but the other one refuses to give in then, let go. They do not deserve to have a fighter. After all, when the fighter fights with his heart, he deserves the best, not what he wants but what he needs.

And dear, "if you ever love two people at the same time, always go for the second one because had you loved the first one enough, you would not fall for the second one." Damn wrong. The second one knows there will be a third one because it has happened once. And just for the record, the chain number is infinite ;) Choose wisely.

Heartache.

Yes I know you are sad sometimes although you always appear with the brightest smile. My heart aches as I know I could not help.

But I will not ask you about it. I have shown you how much I care. The fact is, you dont need my presence at all. It is good that I am there. But with or without me, you are still the same.

And that aches even more.



P/s: The thing is, you will never understand how much I care for you.